It puts the lotion on its skin

B is teething again, or should I say today is a day that ends in 'y'. The problems seem to start about a month before the tooth pops in and then carry on for another week or so before the tooth's partner arrives. So figuring 5 weeks of blech per tooth pair and the fact that he is on his way toward 8 teeth/4 pairs, we are soon to round out 20 weeks or 140 days of meh. B got his first tooth a little after 4 months which means the 20 weeks of awful have been spread over a 5 month period between 3.5 and 8.5 months.

Since I'm not about to perpetuate the pregnancy lie that one month is equal to 4 weeks, let's figure that each month is about 30 days which would make 5 months equal to about 150 days. Referencing my earlier calculation, B has had about 140 days of teething in his most recent 150 days of life.

I'll now pause for dramatic effect while that sinks in.

"Real bread is good for eating but fake bread is better for chewing."

"Aunt Amy's face is even better for chewing," said the next Hannibal Lecter.

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