Oh no it's working

First of all, I have very happy news to share! My baby nephew arrived last night!! Baby T is adorable and healthy and my brother and sister-in-law are healthy, happy, and thrilled!

There's been quite a bit of excitement surrounding this birth. There were some complications with the pregnancy and given how much I worry without cause it comes as no surprise that I worried in this case. The doctors wanted to make sure to get baby T out before things went south so they induced my sis-in-law early which consequently made for a long induction. I don't know how she did it because I was a mess of nerves and anticipation for the whole 48 hour process! Yes, I said 48 hours. Besides feeling great sympathy for the person actually in labor, this gave me a lot of time to think about this little person joining our family. (By "think about" I obviously mean "get all sobby about".) It turns out too much time to think is a dangerous thing for me.

They say that nature makes women forget about the horrors of birth and labor so that we are dumb enough to want to do it again. All this time I've thought that I had triumphed over this phenomenon. I am proud of my long-term memory and reasoning abilities as these were hard earned evolutionary skills that separate woman from beast. I remember how much pregnancy sucked and I remember the physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion of caring for a newborn. I like to think I'm not stupid so I figured given these memories I would have to be talked into walking myself down that road a second time. I said over and over again that the second baby would be even harder because I'm no longer naive about all of this. I know what is involved!!

"Hello there. I think I already love you but you seem like a lot of work."

I should have known I was being too cocky. What I failed to enter into my calculations is that I also know all of the mushy gushy feelings that go along with the torture. As my sis-in-law's 48 hour labor progressed I found myself not only feeling anticipation and excitement but jealousy. I was powerless to resist it and couldn't believe it was happening but I was actually jealous she got to give birth. WHAT.THE.F???? I remember September 16th so fondly and absolutely nothing else can compare. Does it matter that the 9 months preceding and 2 months following kind of sucked?? One would think so but apparently based on mysterious prehistoric calculations performed by my underdeveloped monkey brain that one day of joy somehow supersedes the 11 months of blech.

Maybe those newborn diapers are laced with some sort of opiate to keep us coming back.

No, this is absolutely not my way of announcing that I'm pregnant again and I stand by all of my earlier assertions that I won't be announcing that for quite some time. This is simply my mea culpa. Sorry ladies of humanity for thinking I was above you. It turns out I'm not.

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